Half Empty or Half Full?

Lately I have been kind of bummed out. I just feel like I have been dealt a crappy hand and so I fold and hope the next hand is better…but instead it just keeps being dealt right back to me! I don’t like being down-and-out, no one likes to hang out with a Debbie Downer and it is even worse when YOU are the Debbie in the group! And while I don’t have too many blog friends just yet, I can already tell that I can be open and honest here without anyone judging me or thinking I need to be on Prozac! So, I decided to take a little inventory—while I do have some tough stuff going on right now, I know that I am blessed a million times more, so here is the count.
Tough Stuff:
1. Losing my sister, Erin, and my brother, Andrew in a car accident .Obviously this is the biggest obstacle right now. It has been so hard to lose not only one but two of my siblings—especially since it was in a car accident and thus completely unexpected. I have my good days and my bad days and I am trying to take each one in stride. One thing that is really helping me is the upcoming LifeBanc Fundraiser. Erin and Andrew were both cornea donors and Andrew also donated 5 of his organs. It is such a blessing to know that they continue to live on through the cornea and organs they were able to donate. The LifeBanc is a wonderful organization who has helped my family to accept and embrace the unique gift that my siblings were able to share with others and they are having a 5K/10K/Walk in a few weeks. We are looking for both walkers/runners or donations to help support the team we have created…I will have a post all about that ASAP!
2. Moving. I have lived in the same house my whole life. My parents were in the final stages of building it when I was born. My earliest memories to my most recent memories all center around our family house. We have a huge yard, a pond, garden, trampoline/swing set—all the things that make a house a home. The reason we are moving is twofold. First, my mom just remarried and second, because of the accident (which occurred right in front of our house). While I am thrilled that my mom has found someone who makes her so happy, it is hard to be moving away from my house, the only home I have ever known. My mom says that she will miss our house too but that it is just too hard to be there, especially having to pull out of the driveway each morning and seeing the skid marks and what not from the accident. Obviously I get that, but it doesn’t make it any easier for me to move.
3. School. I really am not looking forward to going back to school. I am not ready for homework, exams, and papers. I am not ready to have to be perky, excited, and nice to freshman (I am an RA in one of the freshman dorms). Plus, I am not really that big of a “partier” so having to go back to dealing with drunken idiots doesn’t sound to exciting either! Blech…
4. My nomad status. On a bit of a lighter note, since my mom just got remarried, she is changing her last name to my stepdad’s last name. I find it kind of strange not to have the same last name as my mom. I told her that I wasn’t too thrilled with the change and she pointed out that when I get married my last name will be changing anyway…Hmm, I hadn’t thought of that…but that doesn’t make me any more content with the situation. I feel like a wandering nomad, I have already had my family downsized by 3 and now I feel like I lost another piece!
Well, that’s enough complaining. To complement the glass half empty attitude, here are a few things that I feel so blessed and lucky to have.
Blessings:
1. Family and Friends. My family and friends have been so supportive, not only throughout the past few months but throughout my entire life. I am a big “family” person and love to hang out with my cousins, aunts/uncles, and especially my Mom. My mom and I are truly best friends and I know that I am so lucky to be able to say that. A lot of people do not have too good of a relationship with their Mom and so I know that I am blessed to be so close to my mom. And, my Stepdad is truly one of the greatest guys I have ever met. He not only takes care of my Mom but he spoils my brother and me to death too! From family vacations to trips to Costco (my all-time favorite store!!) I know I am blessed to have him in my life.
2. Hobbies. I have a lot of hobbies—my top 4 are: 1. Reading 2. Cooking 3. Sewing 4. Running. Jeez, looking over that list I seem like an old lady! But honestly, I love, love, love to read—I will read just about anything. And I am always looking for new recipes to try out, I cook all the time when I am home. My mom loves the break and I love being able to make things that people enjoy! Recently I have begun sewing and it is a blast! I have been working on sewing shirts for my sorority (pictures to come) and I love it. It brings me so much joy to see people’s reactions when I give them a finished shirt, decked out with the patterns and thread they chose! I know a lot of people are not too fond of running but it is one of my all-time favorite things to do. I like the challenge, the time to myself, and the thoughts I am able to reflect on as I run.
3. My freedom. I am so blessed to live in such a wonderful country, where we have soldiers who lay down their lives on a daily basis to protect us. Thank you to all the soldiers and veterans—I wouldn’t be here without you!
4. My internship, my education, the farmers market, the library, my i-pod, going to the movies, trampolines, gardening, peppermint gum, sunshine on my face, watermelon, holidays, vacations…my list of blessings can go on and on.
So, even on days when I am feeling down, it only takes a second before I remember that I am truly blessed and that is what is most important. My glass isn’t half full and it certainly isn’t half empty—rather it is overflowing with blessings! How do you all feel blessed?
Have a great weekend! :)